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« Older entries|Newer entries »Damn you, Disney
As Zach lay in bed the other night, he put his serious face on and said “Mummy.” He continued: “when I grow up… when I get bigger… am I going to be a mermaid?” He is NEVER allowed to see Pixar movies.
March 29th, 2010 by Damian | Posted in Uncategorized | No comments »
Quite the imagination
Zach just droopily slouched his way over to me and collapsed on the couch. “My bones don’t hold me up any more,” he sighed.
March 21st, 2010 by Damian | Posted in Uncategorized | No comments »
Concerning spades
Zach drew a picture after dinner. “This is someone old. This is an old person,” he said. “This is an old person.” “Oh,” said Sarah, “that’s a nice picture.” “This person lives in nippier,” Zach said. “Oh. Napier? Wow.” He continued: “Yes. And we know this person.” “Oh,” said Sarah, realising who he was talking […]
March 12th, 2010 by Damian | Posted in Uncategorized | 1 comment »
On the practical application of manners
Zach: “My want an iceblock, please.” (Mummy gets one and gives it to him and waits for a response) Mummy: “… What do you say?” (Zach gestures to the iceblock wrapping immediately) Zach: “All the way out!”
October 27th, 2009 by Damian | Posted in Uncategorized | No comments »
Contingency planning
(Zach was drawing a picture of the family for his Nana) Zach: “And now I’ll give Daddy a penis… and then my a penis… and now I’ll give you a penis.” Nana: “I don’t have a penis, dear.” Zach: “Well… I’ll give you a little one then. Just in case.”
October 27th, 2009 by Damian | Posted in Uncategorized | No comments »
Beaten to the punch
Mummy: “… and you’ll be walking tomorrow, to use up some of your energy.” Zach: “My keep my energy in my hands.” Mummy: “Goodness.” Zach: “Where does Daddy keep his energy?” Daddy: (tries to think up smart reply) Zach: “In the bum?”
August 10th, 2009 by Damian | Posted in Uncategorized | No comments »
Call ‘em like you see ‘em
“Mummy, there are cocks in there!” – Zach discovering that birds have moved in with his zebras while playing Zoo Tycoon.
August 5th, 2009 by Damian | Posted in Uncategorized | No comments »
Surrealism for the twenty-first century
Zach has been using his mother’s computer to play The Sims 3 quite a lot recently. He has a pretty good grasp of most of it, but he’s just a little free with his money – or anyone else’s money. This led to the following conversation: Sarah: “Why is there an exercise machine in my […]
August 1st, 2009 by Damian | Posted in Uncategorized | 2 comments »
The things she teaches him
“Mummy, mummy, the cat has another bird!” “Oh dear, Zach.” “He’s not eating it yet, though. Shall I go and piss him off?” “Er… sorry?” “Shall I tell him to go away?” “Oh. Oh, yes, that’s a good idea.”
June 17th, 2009 by Damian | Posted in Uncategorized | No comments »
Breakfast, revisited
(looking at his porridge) “My not like it” “Did you try it?” “No, my just mixed it and my not like what it looks like.”
June 12th, 2009 by Damian | Posted in Uncategorized | No comments »
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